Well, at last, we have some Test cricket to look forward to instead of the pyjama shite that has been dirtying our screens for the past few months. England, on paper, should destroy New Zealand, who were an utter embarrassment in South Africa a few months ago and who play very little Test cricket any more.
But I'm not so confident. We have several players - Bell, Panesar, Harmison - who are mentally weak pussies. Our mentally strong players - Collingwood, Hoggard, Strauss - aren't especially blessed with great natural talent. Vaughan, who does have both talent and courage, continually throws his wicket away because he's not prepared to build an innings. Pietersen is the same.
So I fear New Zealand will battle away and make things very difficult for us. The ball will, by all accounts, be swinging around corners so the Yorkshire duo of Hoggy and Sidebottom must bowl well.
I predict England to scrape it 2-1.
Starts tonight 9pm SS2.
The High Priest is working tirelessly to hold the congegration together in these benighted times.