Trialists, Transfers & Speculation

Discussion on LUFC and absolutely anything... welcome to the Dark Side
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jackos
Joined: Mon Feb 11, 2008 7:49 am
Location: Stockholm

Re: Trialists, Transfers & Speculation

Postby jackos » Mon Jun 09, 2008 11:48 am

thechubbyone wrote:
eric olthwaite wrote:Have you ever read that thing about measuring the maleness of males?

Apparently, if you lay your hand flat on the table and your ring finger is significantly longer than your index finger, you are far more likely to exhibit great sporting prowess and be a walking, raging storm of testerone fuelled masculinity.

I've measured my fingers and, well, let's just say I'm in touch with my feminine side :oops:

My ring finger is significantly longer........ than my cock. What does that mean?



You have either 1> A very long ring finger, or
2> a very short cock ....

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eric olthwaite
Joined: Mon Feb 11, 2008 10:14 pm
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Re: Trialists, Transfers & Speculation

Postby eric olthwaite » Mon Jun 09, 2008 11:52 am

dirty leeds wrote:Odd how it always comes down to cock-size with footballers. And women.


Have to say that women's cock size is an issue I've always tended to avoid.

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sunshine whites
Joined: Wed Mar 19, 2008 9:54 pm

Re: Trialists, Transfers & Speculation

Postby sunshine whites » Mon Jun 09, 2008 12:15 pm

A. Cole appearing in transfer news - thats definantly the biggest cock to show up here for a while .. Jeez surely there must be better options out there...
Crikey we just had the Flo, Thomo (no) show experience, err Robbie Fowler (are we still paying his wages) need we go on. No question these guys WERE great players but sadly experience proves they are off the pace and simply too injury prone.
Defination of .. Coal is a fossil... where plant remains were preserved by water and mud. :mrgreen:

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dirty leeds
Joined: Mon Feb 11, 2008 12:13 pm
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Re: Trialists, Transfers & Speculation

Postby dirty leeds » Mon Jun 09, 2008 3:38 pm

eric olthwaite wrote:
dirty leeds wrote:Odd how it always comes down to cock-size with footballers. And women.


Have to say that women's cock size is an issue I've always tended to avoid.



You should see t' ladyboys up by t' East Dulwich rain gauge, Eric...

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jackos
Joined: Mon Feb 11, 2008 7:49 am
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Re: Trialists, Transfers & Speculation

Postby jackos » Mon Jun 09, 2008 5:09 pm

Any how, back to the Cole news - a 36 year old Scummer? No ta.

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Ontolly
Joined: Mon Feb 11, 2008 9:36 pm
Location: Shrewsbury

Re: Trialists, Transfers & Speculation

Postby Ontolly » Mon Jun 09, 2008 5:56 pm

Supernorm wrote:By the way, why did the commentators start calling him Andrew Cole, he was Andy for a long long time, then he suddenly became Andrew for the past couple of seasons

My understanding is somebody else had bought the website http://www.andycole.com, or wanted too much money for it so he changed the way he wanted to be addressed to fit in with how he could best market himself :roll:
The cunt has a personalised number plate too - so long as he changes his name to DS031 HTU :o
The only thing we knew for sure about Henry Porter was that his name wasn't Henry Porter.

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KK Spunky69
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Re: Trialists, Transfers & Speculation

Postby KK Spunky69 » Mon Jun 09, 2008 6:28 pm

Well I smell a rat, and its an old fat fucker with white whiskers and glasses like milk bottle bottoms. In anticipation of season tickets sales coming back online (they just have I believe) we are linked with not 1 but 3 proven strikers (albeit 1 is old, 1 is a old scum cunt and the 3rd plies his trade in the thistle league) in the space of a week, reeks a little of raising a little excitement which I guess is all good but lets face it we can't afford Riordan, Phillips will end up elsewhere in the Chumpionship and Cole is about an exciting a prospect as having my marmite lathered balls sucked by a Doberman on crack.

Of the 3, I would take Riordan, sadly he is probably the least likely IMO.

Oh and you are all cocks, the measure of each is not in question.
Guns will make us powerful, butter will only make us fat.

Can you hear the red scum sing? I can't hear a fucking thing.

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Phil LUFC
Joined: Tue Feb 12, 2008 12:26 pm
Location: Scunthorpe

Re: Trialists, Transfers & Speculation

Postby Phil LUFC » Tue Jun 10, 2008 2:15 pm

It would seem we're not going to be signing Davis from Tranmere, he's apparently on the verge of joining Derby.

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jackos
Joined: Mon Feb 11, 2008 7:49 am
Location: Stockholm

Re: Trialists, Transfers & Speculation

Postby jackos » Wed Jun 11, 2008 8:13 am

Shame he wasn't up to it, we could do with a few more players in the squad that actually give a fuck about the club

Elding gutted at United snub

Published Date: 11 June 2008
By Leon Wobschall
Unwanted striker Anthony Elding admits he is gutted to be heading for the Leeds United exit door after less than four-and-a-half months at the club.
Whites boss Gary McAllister has told the 26-year-old – who comes from a family of Leeds fans – that he is not in his future plans.

The Elland Road club granted him permission to speak to Crewe late last week after Alex tabled a six-figure bid, but a switch to Cheshire is in doubt.

However, with several other clubs circling, the smart money is on the former Stockport frontman – who arrived at United in a £125,000 deal at the end of January – leaving this summer.

Elding, who has started just three matches under McAllister, feels he hasn't been given a fair crack of the whip by the Leeds manager and he is determined to prove him wrong.

He said: "I'm gutted. I never got a chance and I feel a bit hard done by.

"They obviously paid money to bring me in to play but, from the minute I've got here, I've hardly played. I've been on the bench, but when I've come on, it's been for a minute or five minutes. What can I do in that time? If I'm going to be judged on that, then there is no point.

"Gary has made it quite clear he is bringing his own people in.

"I said to Gary, 'look, I've got a two-year contract, I want to honour that contract, I want to stay at Leeds United. But it's no good me sitting around if I'm not going to be part of something. I'm a striker, I need to play football'.

"I don't want to leave – 100 per cent. I love the club, my family love the club and it's a massive club to play for. But at the end of the day I'm a footballer and whether it's Leeds United or Boston United I need to play football.

"My family are gutted for me, they really are. But like I've said to them, 'you'll still support Leeds'. But, from a personal point of view, I've got to move on. There's no point me dwelling on what might have been."

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the flying pig
Joined: Mon Feb 11, 2008 8:24 am

Re: Trialists, Transfers & Speculation

Postby the flying pig » Wed Jun 11, 2008 8:59 am

yeah, i only saw elding play an hour or two hours at most of football for leeds but i can easily believe that he isn't good enough, he didn't really look to me like he had many real qualities.

with freedman & beckford both probably [if you believe old hot shot's comments in the yp] leaving our need for two very good league one strikers is becoming quite pressing.

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jackos
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Re: Trialists, Transfers & Speculation

Postby jackos » Wed Jun 11, 2008 9:20 am

N the answer to that TFP seems to be Cole ..--

Cole considers Leeds switch
Published Date: 11 June 2008
By Ian Laws
Sunderland AFC writer
ANDY Cole's brief Sunderland career looks like ending with a player-coach role at Leeds United.
The League One outfit – who lost out to Doncaster in last month's play-off for a return to the Championship – hope to woo Cole with the offer of a two-year deal and a first step on the coaching ladder.

The former Newcastle and Manchester United hitman is out of contract on Wearside after only one season at the Stadium of Light.

Boss Roy Keane gambled on the 36-year-old being able to muster some of the magic that brought him so many goals elsewhere during his career, but it didn't really happen for Cole, who was hampered by injuries.

He made only eight appearances – including just three starts – before being farmed out on loan to Burnley at the end of last season.

Cole rejected an offer to join the Clarets on a permanent basis, but is tempted by the offer from Leeds boss Gary McAllister

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SimonB
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Re: Trialists, Transfers & Speculation

Postby SimonB » Wed Jun 11, 2008 9:26 am

Not sure an old, probably crocked, striker is what we need.
We had a meeting at work today and I was asked what steps I would take in the event of a fire. Apparently "fucking big ones" wasn't the right answer

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jackos
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Re: Trialists, Transfers & Speculation

Postby jackos » Wed Jun 11, 2008 9:29 am

SimonB wrote:Not sure an old, probably crocked, striker is what we need.


N a scummer at that, a 36 year old scummer - maybe we can bring Teddy Sherringham out of retirement while we're at it?

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the flying pig
Joined: Mon Feb 11, 2008 8:24 am

Re: Trialists, Transfers & Speculation

Postby the flying pig » Wed Jun 11, 2008 9:51 am

cole, i don't know, how good would be be in league one?

impossible to say, i reckon.

his career stats are available here

http://www.burnleyfootballclub.premiumt ... 91,00.html

he scored quite a few goals for burnley last season, possibly enough to suggest that he'd do well in our division if his fitness held out.

it's all about the money though - making him [say] by far the best paid player in our division would be a nonsense, because i reckon he'd be fairly unlikely to be the best player in it...

a sensible deal, with a bit of coaching experience thrown in, that was heavily geared towards bonuses for appearances, goals, & so on, might suit both sides.

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The High Priest
Joined: Wed Feb 13, 2008 8:43 am
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Re: Trialists, Transfers & Speculation

Postby The High Priest » Wed Jun 11, 2008 9:56 am

No scum at Elland Road.
The High Priest is working tirelessly to hold the congegration together in these benighted times.

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jackos
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Location: Stockholm

Re: Trialists, Transfers & Speculation

Postby jackos » Wed Jun 11, 2008 10:01 am

the flying pig wrote:a sensible deal, with a bit of coaching experience thrown in, that was heavily geared towards bonuses for appearances, goals, & so on, might suit both sides.


I'm hoping that Bates ain't a mug n has been around too long to make any mistakes when he signs a contract - I still do wonder what sort of deal Flo was on though ... To be honest stuff like this still shocks me - it's like the "Sporting Lokeren" friendly - I know we're shit, I know we can't even compete with the likes of .. Well the blunts at the moment - but every time I wake up n realise how hard n far we have fallen it hurts ..

Jovo Simanic
Joined: Mon Feb 18, 2008 6:40 pm

Re: Trialists, Transfers & Speculation

Postby Jovo Simanic » Wed Jun 11, 2008 10:05 am

Cole might be a good signing. Asides from the fact he's a scummer and probably a bit of a twat, most of the criticism seems to be that he's old, crocked, not quick enough etc.. It's basically the same criticism levelled at Freedman before he arrived (at least by me) and Dougie was superb. It seems like this League's so shit that the old cliches of having a bit of "nous" and "the first yard is in the head" might apply and Cole did score 6 in 13 in a higher league last season.

Can't say I'd be delighted to sign him but we need to get out of this league and, short of some genius scouting, any decent striker's either going to cost a lot or want to play at a higher level so we may have to accept that "has beens", loans and "out of favour" players are what we're realistically going to get.

Given that we got rid of Flo and Thompson, the squad's not exactly packed with the over 30's either.

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Ponte
Joined: Mon Feb 11, 2008 9:36 am
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Re: Trialists, Transfers & Speculation

Postby Ponte » Wed Jun 11, 2008 10:06 am

The High Priest wrote:No scum at Elland Road.


Did you say that about Strachan?
You agree not to post any abusive, obscene, vulgar, slanderous, hateful, threatening or sexually-orientated material. Doing so may lead to you being immediately and permanently banned.
Hmmm.

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the flying pig
Joined: Mon Feb 11, 2008 8:24 am

Re: Trialists, Transfers & Speculation

Postby the flying pig » Wed Jun 11, 2008 10:08 am

jackos wrote:...I'm hoping that Bates ain't a mug n has been around too long to make any mistakes when he signs a contract - I still do wonder what sort of deal Flo was on though... ..


flo, well, yes, it's all in the price isn't it...

if he was on [say] a grand a week and a couple of grand per goal, then flo was a very good signing for us, a good experienced guy to have around the club, a few modestly useful contributions to the first XI, mostly from the bench, and so on.

if he was on [say] ten grand a week or something then the flo signing was right down there with some of the worst in the history of the club.


not having any clue whatsoever how much he was earning i can only really shrug my shoulders about the whole thing & reserve strong opinions for thigns that one can see with one's own eyes and/or information that's in teh public domain.

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The High Priest
Joined: Wed Feb 13, 2008 8:43 am
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Re: Trialists, Transfers & Speculation

Postby The High Priest » Wed Jun 11, 2008 10:09 am

PW wrote:Did you say that about Strachan?


The only exceptions are those who may have a grudge against scum due to mistreatment, e.g. Giles, Strachan.

Those who are still paid-up scum lovers (like Cole) are persona non grata so far as I am concerned.
The High Priest is working tirelessly to hold the congegration together in these benighted times.


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