The creekit

[The High Priest]

Well, at last, we have some Test cricket to look forward to instead of the pyjama shite that has been dirtying our screens for the past few months. England, on paper, should destroy New Zealand, who were an utter embarrassment in South Africa a few months ago and who play very little Test cricket any more.

But I'm not so confident. We have several players - Bell, Panesar, Harmison - who are mentally weak pussies. Our mentally strong players - Collingwood, Hoggard, Strauss - aren't especially blessed with great natural talent. Vaughan, who does have both talent and courage, continually throws his wicket away because he's not prepared to build an innings. Pietersen is the same.

So I fear New Zealand will battle away and make things very difficult for us. The ball will, by all accounts, be swinging around corners so the Yorkshire duo of Hoggy and Sidebottom must bowl well.

I predict England to scrape it 2-1.

Starts tonight 9pm SS2.

[Rob]

Much looking forward to this series. A Bondless NZ should be beaten. Would have liked to see how Ryder went in the tests. I'll also go 2-1 to England. Not the strongest of batting line ups from either team.

[Rob]

Check out this clip of Aussie Andrew Symonds taking out a streaker during last night's ODI in Brisbane. I like him a bit more now.

[Jovo Simanic]

Should be a good series. They're weak enough that we might beat them. I'm off to the south island for much of the next month so am looking forward to, hopefull, haranguing my kiwi relatives about how shit they are at the game.

[Dale White]

I'll be watching,i reckon we might just scrape the series 2-1 but it wouldn't be a surprise if we lost it either,agree about Harmy being mentally weak but you are way off the mark about Bell,he's very tough imho.

[SimonB]

282 for 6 at the end of the first day, relatively even I suppose. As always will depend on our ability to clear their tail quickly later today

[The High Priest]

I'll be watching,i reckon we might just scrape the series 2-1 but it wouldn't be a surprise if we lost it either,agree about Harmy being mentally weak but you are way off the mark about Bell,he's very tough imho.

Bollocks.

The Sherminator couldn't cash in on a start even if he was batting in Fort Knox.

[Dale White]

I'll be watching,i reckon we might just scrape the series 2-1 but it wouldn't be a surprise if we lost it either,agree about Harmy being mentally weak but you are way off the mark about Bell,he's very tough imho.

Bollocks.

The Sherminator couldn't cash in on a start even if he was batting in Fort Knox.

His batting average shows that you are wrong and thats the last time i'm going to reply to owt you say, you are clearly a stupid fucking cunt.

[Dale White]

NZ 470 Eng 86/2 at the close of play,pitch is dead as a fucking dodo.

[SimonB]

I get the feeling we are going to fuck this up and go one down in the series

[The High Priest]

It's yet more soft-as-fuck cricket from England. Credit to Sidebottom, what the hell is wrong with Hoggard?

It's embarrassing to be gifting debut centuries to severely limited players like Ross Taylor.

Pathetic.

[blokefromyorkshire]

Nudging along nicely so far, but a bit slow.

[blokefromyorkshire]

Nudging along nicely so far, but a bit slow.

Scratch that.

Fucking Vaughan!

[Dale White]

286/6 at the close of play,fucking turgid stuff but thats down to the pitch it's shite.

[The High Priest]

Woeful cricket.

As for Bottler Bell - I fucking told you!

[Dale White]

I said i wouldn't reply to owt you said in this thread but just to prove you wrong, again,Bell got a delivery that cut back off the the pitch and hit the the top of the off stump,it was the first ball to swing in during the whole fucking match it had nothing to do with bottle.You are posting shite about a sport that you clearly know fuck all about apart from what you read in the daily mail,if you cant copy and paste about a topic you are fucked.

[The High Priest]

I said i wouldn't reply to owt you said in this thread but just to prove you wrong, again,Bell got a delivery that cut back off the the pitch and hit the the top of the off stump,it was the first ball to swing in during the whole fucking match it had nothing to do with bottle.You are posting shite about a sport that you clearly know fuck all about apart from what you read in the daily mail,if you cant copy and paste about a topic you are fucked.

You obviously missed his earlier edge to Fleming. If Fleming had been standing in the right place, Bell would have gone an hour earlier!

The Sherminator has all the presence of a fucking wet squib. Get the ginger cunt out and get someone in with a bit of bottle!

[Dale White]

I suppose Vaughan lacks bottle seeing as he edged a straight ball from an off spinner to get himself out,a harder thing to do than win the lottery !,and that is the last time i'm joining your fishing expedition.

[The High Priest]

I suppose Vaughan lacks bottle seeing as he edged a straight ball from an off spinner to get himself out,a harder thing to do than win the lottery !,and that is the last time i'm joining your fishing expedition.

Vaughan lacks bottle? The Vaughan who battered McGrath and Warne into submission in 2000/1 down in Oz? Yeah, right!

And don't forget that England won the Ashes in 2005 with 10 men - because The Sherminator wet himself every time he walked on the fucking field!

You must be Bell's boyfriend cos I've never known someone get so pissy over criticism of The Sherminator's obvious lack of bottle.

He certainly plays like a poofter anyway!

[Dale White]

Go on then one more,i didn't say Vaughan lacks bottle,read what i said properly and stop trying to put words in my mouth.